May can stretch time as Stephen Hawking predicted!

It appears that time is relative – just speed up your car to the speed of light, go round the milky-way once, and you will be younger than your peers who were the same age when you popped off!

Ms. May is doing the same trick in Great Britain by promising that the singular event called Brexit will actually happen at a fixed time that can be made to be longer if she says so! We all know that the Brits have no plan for leaving or exiting the EU because if they did there would not be any majority in Parliament to vote for either solution…

… and she knows full well that the EU will not accept her last proposal because it lacks clear substance. The British press call this a “fudge” which is a simple soft sweet made from butter and sugar that melts your teeth and causes a hardening of the arteries, diabetes, and other nasties. They also use the word to describe a bad or weak proposal.

So this week, Ms. May, who voted for Remain, has now once again achieved her objective as Party Leader and Prime Minister to stay in power and keep the UK in the EU for another week.

Her resilience and her diligence in achieving this weekly objective must be due to her strong sense of belonging to Europe’s oldest and greatest country in the world, a country that believes in independence and superiority to the rest of the world: 

  1. Just look how much Trump wanted to meet the Queen.
  2. The Brits have the best universities in the world – Oxford and Cambridge.
  3. They defeated the German nazis led by Hitler 70 years ago that would have destroyed the whole of Europe.
  4. They can feel justly proud of their country. Just look how the Russians love visiting Salisbury, while other wealthy Russians are buying huge mansions in the best parts of London properly issued with what the Brits call “Golden Visas”. These are not the banking cards but real entry visas for the very, very rich with just a simple investment of a few hundred million, with few questions asked…
  5. … and the Arab community just love it to, along with the newcomers , the Chinese millionaires and their families.

Most ordinary people know that Prime Ministers come and go. They are just a passing thing,  like ours in Finland. But the Brits have something more permanent that stands high above these off-the-shelf politicians in Westminster. This is the Queen and her offspring who have suddenly metamorphosed into a huge numbers of “newly-wedded baby delivering folk”. Their smiling presence in gilded palaces really puts a shine on things when life gets challenging for ordinary folk – the horror of Brexit, the horror of house prices, the horror of Boris saying nasty things about Theresa, the horror of 4 million children not getting enough proper food, and the horror of Universal Credits not arriving, can all be forgotten in an instant when the Daily Mail runs a pretty set of pictures of Harry and his wife’s lovely dress and hat. 

The power of royal families is a great way to gloss over what needs to be done, especially when the press know that they can bank on huge profits with the right stories and pictures whatever happens to these folk in the limelight.

So Theresa can stretch time and as time passes people will start to forget that there was a referendum. They will enjoy their beer and vinegar flavoured crisps and start to plan their next holidays in Spain and France, with their Swedish au-pair girl joining them as if Brexit was just a good or bad dream.

Photo: Photographs by Mark Jones (Flickr)

Site Footer